WAY off track

So....as if you couldn't tell by my complete lack of postings, I've fallen off....the planet! MAN! I'm like a drug addict who just went on a three week cruise with Willie Nelson! I've had to work a TON and it's completely taken my eye off the ball. To be honest, I don't even know where I am weight wise, because I haven't been to the gym in....a while.

I'm trying to find the desire to do this again. My biggest hurdle is that I KNOW I can lose the weight - what I don't know is how to keep it off. I realize that there is not one answer, other than a life time of working on it every day. I just have to commit to that and make a choice.

My goal of 100 lbs lost by Sept. 1, 2010 STILL STANDS and I will achieve it. I'm just making it harder and harder on myself. I just want a good, interesting, photo finish for "my loyal readers." :-)

I promise to more diligently write, if nothing else.

thanks for reading!

Had a better week!

267. Not a huge loss, but the GOOD news is, I re-found my desire! I'm back on track and I'm excited about the next phase.

I'd better get SERIOUS!

I've REALLY taken my eye off the ball these last couple of weeks and had a bad weigh-in this morning. 268.0. I gained a couple back. Bummer. I've GOT to find a way to motivate myself to continue to eat right, even when I can't get to the gym. I'll work it out, I know that. THIS will be a great week!

265.2....I guess a loss is a loss.

I had a....hard time getting to the gym this week. I slept an average of 5 hours per night. Weeks like this happen in my job and I've just GOT to find a way around them. Struggle continues.

I'm still here!

Hey! My good friend, Greg, reminded me that it HAS indeed been far too long since my last post - not to mention I neglected to update my weight and photos on Monday! May I be placed in a burlap sack and ritualistically beaten! SORRY! Explanation - I've been working 16+ hour days the past 5 days straight. Good times! Truly!

266 as of Monday. 4.2 more lbs on the gym floor. It's strange, because I'm still AHEAD of the schedule I've placed for myself - 2 lbs per week, but I've lost weight SO FAST in that past that I find myself wishing I was shedding the rolls faster again...even though that has NEVER worked for me long term. I need to grasp the fact that I need to do something DIFFERENT this time - namely, make it a lasting change.

Watched The Biggest Loser again tonight. SUCH a great show! So totally motivating!

I was able to comfortably wear two "new" pairs of pants this week. Funny how such little effort over so short a period of time can make such changes. I'm starting to feel subtle differences - more energy, less back pain, etc... Makes me wonder why I keep sliding back to fat-man status when I KNOW how much better I feel without the weight....

Racquetball tonight!

I've got to be honest - I'm playing racquetball with my buddy Aaron tonight and I'm so excited! We used to play at least twice a week....but we stopped for some reason and haven't really played in quite a while. I'm looking forward to really beating the crap out of him tonight! ;-)

If you don't know Aaron, who works with me at my Provo store, you SHOULD! He is one funny dude! Beating him used to be a real high point in my week, so I'm excited to get back to it!

Not to mention - racquetball is one of the better work outs I've ever had!!! I'm telling you, you can work up biggest looser type sweat! Very nice!

The Biggest Loser

Short and sweet - without QUESTION the most motivating, inspiring show ever on the boobtube! If THEY can do it - anyone can! Tonight, while watching, I couldn't help but think, "MAN - I'm so glad that I'm dieting and working out - I couldn't handle the guilt otherwise!!!" Awesome!

HOLY HAIRDO!!!!

Know what I just realized? I'm NOT the craziest person in my main picture at the top of this blog. Look at the hair on the guy just over my right shoulder! HE WENT IN PUBLIC LIKE THAT! At least I was posing for a picture....I'm just sayin'....

Week Two behind me

270.2. 3.2 more pounds. I was hoping for more, but not expecting as much. I know that week two's can be harsh as my body adjusts, and I had 4 nights with 4 or less hours sleep....which lead to less workouts. No excuses - I'm actually pretty pleased with 3.2 lbs and am still quite ahead of schedule.

For the most part, I'm settling in to my new routine and eating plan. I don't struggle with cravings too often....but MAN-O-MAN - that Jezebel wife of mine nearly brought my destruction this weekend. She decided to make brownies for a few parties we were having or attending. If you've never had Ambers brownies....you're likely much thinner than me! They are AMAZING.

...so....there they sat. On my counter. Hour after hour. Starring, laughing, mocking. Temping me. "just a nibble"... Well, I'll admit, I ate a few CRUMBS - literally, crumbs, no more than the combined total of a postage stamp. But I held back my TIDE OF DESIRE and am quite proud of me.

Honestly, even while typing that last part I had to stick a piece of gum in my mouth to stave off the watering....

THANKS BABE!!! ;-)

New pics below. Warning: these really accentuate my LOVELY man-boobs. View with caution!

Food makes me happy....and that's sad

Conundrum. I didn't even know how to spell it, but I know what it means. I'm completely convinced that I would be in GREAT shape if I didn't like food. It's funny that something we must have to sustain life, can also have such drastic blowback. I guess a lot of things are like that:

Water - you've got to have some....but not too much. Just ask the patrons of the Titanic...ya know, when you get there.

Fire - cozy and nice....unless you're Freddy Kruger!

Neil Diamond - Cherry Cherry is a great song. Sweat Caroline and a FEW select others on a very occasional basis are quite nice....but too much of that and you're likely to just snap completely and kill everyone and then you!

Food is this way. The real problem with me is I enjoy the social aspect (sitting around chatting over food - discussing different kinds of food, etc) as much as anything. It's a LOT easier to get excited about a thick juicy steak than a fat, stringy celery stalk. I'm just sayin...

Sleep or workout?!?

The age old struggle....

I usually fight harder than I did this morning....I contend that it's harder to win that fight when you work until 1am - but NO excuses! I'll be hitting the gym right after work today!

Week one in the books!

273.4. 8.1lbs lost during week one! Whew! I thought there would be more left on the gym floor....but I'll take it!

I've decided that going to the gym on holiday's is a double edged sword. If you're like me - lazy at heart - on your way into the gym you're thinking "wait! I'm that guy that I HATE!!!!! "oh...I know it's Thanksgiving but I just HAVE to wake up early and get my 5 miles in or I'll hate myself for every morsel I allow to pass my thin, life-hating lips"...I can't be this guy!!!!!"

....On the other hand - there are considerably less people there which makes it an all-around more enjoyable experience! oh, the give and take of life!

Pics of me at week one below. Careful - these are TRULY exciting shots! ;-)

My Blob!

I had to share a FUNNY little exchange that happened today. We went up the canyon tonight with my sister's family and our friends and this blog came up. My sister asked why I hadn't posted my official before picture because she had been "watching my blob!" ....I'm hoping she meant blog - but, let's face it, she's right either way!

Cheat day

So, for every diet I've every been successful with, including the time I lost around 80 lbs...I've always had a "cheat day." A day set aside for me to eat some of the things I DO NOT eat during any other time of the week. This helps me keep my sanity and keeps me from killing everyone and then me.

This time around is no exception. Fridays are my day to eat things that I've been craving during the rest of the week. In the past I've ALWAYS looked so forward to Fridays (and I will no doubt get there again) but, honestly, I struggled yesterday - which I'm pretty sure is a good sign. I didn't cheat one little bit, until Amber and I went on a date to Olive Garden last night....I know that "the change" is already starting and I'm going to be very successful with loosing and keeping the weight off this time around!

SORE!!!!

OUCH!!!!! MAN!!!!!!

Every movement I make makes me wish I hadn't moved. Is this God's way of saying STOP DOING THIS? Or...is it a sign that I might need to do it a little more frequently?!? Unfortunately, it's likely the latter....

Either way, I've decided that you KNOW you got a great work out when it's a struggle to wash your hair! And boy o boy was it hard for me to wash my hair today!!!

Hamster...

I can't help it....this is how I feel on a treadmill....Am I alone in this? The only difference is that I don't get to use one of those awesome upside down water bottle things. I'd like that! ;-)

Another day - going strong!

And so it begins...

I hit the gym this morning for the first time in so long that they had actually completely re-designed it since my last visit! A few things hadn't changed since my last visit - the gym is still populated by the same types of people:

1 - the guys who just plain and simple spend WAY too much time there

2 - the girls who are DYING for you to look at them

3 - those people who just want to get in a good work out, don't want to be noticed or talked to.

4 - the older folks - some of whom are CRAZY in shape

5 - the big guys...like me. Sweating just from the walk into the building. Most of us don't last that long, which is why there is never a shortage of this genre! However, I will break free! Within a matter of months I will proudly be a number 3!

I'm excited to get to that place where I don't HATE working out...typically takes me about 2-3 weeks to get there.

So, it's Monday, and I've set Monday aside as weigh-in day. I was not surprised to see that I'm about as heavy as I've ever been currently. My weight today is 281.5 pounds. MAN! I just can't believe how FAST it happens. It wasn't more than a couple of months ago that I was closer to 240. Oh well....have to start somewhere. The good news is, I can easily accomplish my goal of 100 pounds lost over the next year and still have a few to go. It would be harder to drop 100 lbs if I was starting at 140! :-) I'll post a picture tonight. I KNOW you can hardly wait!

Day one in T minus 6 hours!!

Well...here goes! I'm taking my fight public. Bright and early tomorrow morning I'll be trudging out to the gym to begin this journey of massive weight loss for, what WILL become, the LAST time! Knowing me it will come as no surprise that I've struggled with weight my whole life. The simple fact is, I'm so used to being "the big guy" that I don't realize HOW BIG I really am!

It's a bit humiliating, but I settled on this plan by watching a smaltsy, whispy chick flick called 'Julie and Julia'...I actually really enjoyed it! The premise was that a 29 year old girl needed something fulfilling, a calling if you will, to fill her life and make her feel accomplished before her 30th birthday. So, with a little help from her husband, she takes on the task of cooking and blogging her way through Julia Child's entire cookbook in one year. It's difficult, and trying...but in the end it completely transforms her life.

The similarities are quite stark. I find myself a 29 year old who is rapidly approaching the big 3-oh! I've got a beautiful, supportive wife who is in amazing shape and is so willing to help me in every way to achieve this goal. I've also got an amazing, intelligent, hilarious 3 year old daughter (and a 9 week old SOMETHING on the way!!!) who is getting smart enough to realize certain things. Such as, that her daddy is the tubby daddy in the neighborhood. There is nothing I want less than to disappoint her in any way. I want to be the cool daddy!

So, with that in mind, I take it upon myself to change - and, rest assured, I WILL CHANGE! This blog will be the distinguishing factor! I will be 100%, brutally honest! You will know everything! This will, no doubt, not be for the weak of heart. Just think of it as a year long version of 'The Biggest Loser' with subtitles!

I'll be weighing in and posting a current picture once a week throughout. It is my hope that I can inspire lasting change in myself, and, perhaps a few others along the way!

Buckle up - it's going to be a great ride! :-)